What a juggler does...

I know I have not been blogging lately. Well, juggling between work, self study and gym is definitely draining out every energy from the body as well as the from the brain. I can't help but collapsed on the bed once arrived home, only to be awaken by some frantic person who thought there might be an emergency earlier on. False alarm, and I've been staying up since then.

For a person who is not that discipline enough, gym and study have taken the second place. I know I should have placed study as the priority but I get exhausted so fast and whatever goes in, comes out the other side, argghhh... I am always a last minute person. I need the weekend to recharge myself, otherwise I go berserck when the time comes, ahaha...

The CNY is around the corner, another holiday on the calendar. I need to get things organized so that the study and gym won't get affected that much, although I am doubting it now. It's the rainy season, and that's kinda boring. Wet wet wet. Ok, better catch some rest before coming to another hectic day.

The Uncle who Appreciates better

When the feeling of being ignored by the system so intense and the career at the lowest point; feeling as if it's time to give up and head for another direction, uncle B wrote down on a piece of paper and conveyed it to me this morning. I was speechless, literally speechless. The tear gland was stimulated but I was holding back. I couldn't react and I didn't know how to react. There were people around us. And I was doing my usual job in the morning.

"Whenever (yours sincerely) is around, I feel safe and that my worries are all gone."

It was a reflex to be a little stuttered. Words uttered out quickly, "Uncle...uncle...I..." I was stucked. Embarassed. I saw him got worse and recovered. But it wasn't me alone with him along the battle. "I don't deserve that". Shyly, I moved away.

Being in a system where merits means nothing, and future career being oppressed for putting the best at work, can simply be summarized as demotivating. Looking at others climbing the ladder so easily and effortlessly due to certain background making one wonders if qualifications are really necessary at this place. Where quantities are prioritized than qualities, I have forgotten what's the reason of getting into this field. I want to believe this is changing, or at least will change. Somehow this perception seems so faraway from being able to be achieved.

It's like a stage afterall, or a play. You don't even have to put up a face at work, just come to work whenever you like and do whatever you want, and be whatever you desire, the work performance will only be judged on who you are in the end of the day and not the work you have put in. Ironic. It is indeed. It's no more a rat race. It's a different league afterall.

The rain has been going on since noon. I am tired, very tired indeed. I remember visualizing a child clasping both his hands and pray at night, so that tomorrow will be a better day.

Uncle has shown me some comfort today. Thank you.

Back to work

Hola!

Back to gym today after a long break. Took it slowly and steady, haha..dun wanna hurt the muscles too much. The gym was a little quiet today, probably some are still on holiday.

As for me, I had a long break from work. Had an interview to attend and visiting the family. Thus going back to routine is something that needs time to adjust now. Life is more stable and in control after getting back to work.

Recovering from facial breakouts. I tend to drink less when travelling. Maybe it wasn't convenient or I was simply too occupied that I had forgotten to drink.

The headache is getting very prevalent nowadays. I think I might need to get some scans done but as usual the lazy bugs always hold me back. The toenail is getting better after some treatment, I need to really take care of my toes. Hmmm...what else. Guess that's all for today.

Oh yea, not able to upload the video on white water rafting, what a waste. It was so exciting to watch than really doing it, haha.

Cheers!